Bad Channels. Film Review

wped1707f8_05_06BAD CHANNELS
Director: Ted Nicolau
Screenplay: Charles Band, Keith S. Payson
Starring: Robert Factor, Martha Quinn, Aaron Lustig
Run Time: 88 Mins
Certificate: 15
Format: DVD
Reviewed by Guy Adams

God bless Charles Band and God bless 88 Films for continuing to pummel his insane output into my home. I can’t honestly think of another production company other than Full Moon that succeeded in releasing so many unlikely movies. The ideas are ludicrous, the budgets nonexistent, the pleasure endless.

BAD CHANNELS (or, as I prefer to think of it, VIDEO KILLED THE RADIO STAR), tells the age old story of an alien and his pet robot as they take over a small radio station and use its frequency to steal women, miniaturise them and store them in bottles. Yeah, I know, that old chestnut.

Each time a girl is kidnapped, we have a surreal, pop video segment where a different band performs onscreen, the victim finally succumbing to the MTV lure, vanishing and reappearing, imprisoned, in diminutive form (what is with Charles Band and tiny people? I’m beginning to suspect he once had a sexual experience while reading Gulliver’s Travels).

It’s nonsense of the highest order. Utterly, utterly ridiculous. I also can’t help suspecting the director was getting extra money for shooting the music videos on the side, they’re so incongruous and lengthy there has to be a con at work. Either that or it was all to help sell the soundtrack album (which also included the rather sparse score by Blue Oyster Cult).

I mean, yes, it’s huckstering of the most blatant, cringeworthy kind but, Lord knows, it’s hard to mind when it’s so entertaining. It’s like having your pocket picked by a drunk clown.

88 Films’ disc, like all of their Full Moon re-releases, comes with the original ‘Videozone’ segment, Full Moon’s regular making-of feature and general enthuse-dump.

I don’t know which is more impressive, the fact these films were made and released in the first place or that 88 Films are so enthusiastically re-releasing them. Whichever, it’s all to the good in my book.

About Phil Lunt (799 Articles)
Hailing from the rain-sodden, North Western wastelands of England, Phil has dabbled in many an arcane vocation. From rock-star to conveyor-belt scraper at a bread factory, 'Dairy Logistics Technician' to world's worst waiter. He's currently a freelance designer, actor, sometime writer/editor and Chair of the British Fantasy Society. He is on the Global Frequency and is still considering becoming an astronaut when he grows up.