Hell Comes to Frogtown. Film Review

HELL_CT_FROGTOWN_3D_DUALHELL COMES TO FROGTOWN

Director: Donald G. Jackson & R. J. Kizer

Screenplay: Donald G. Jackson & Randall Frakes

Starring: Roddy Piper, Sandahl Bergman, Cec Verrell, William Smith, Rory Calhoun

Certificate: 15

Running Time: 86 Mins

Format: Blu-ray/DVD Combo Pack

Release Date 03/02/14

Reviewed by Guy Adams

My partner’s brother’s been paying us a visit. In the evening we tend to watch a movie. He tends to hate it. Or damn it with faint acceptance. This is fine, he’s a fun vampire, he can’t help it.

Knowing I had some review discs en route, my partner asked if there was anything in there we might watch together.

“Well,” I told her, “there’s HELL COMES TO FROGTOWN.”

Her face didn’t quite know what expression to go for. It settled for the look I have grown to call: ‘Number 33: Weary Tolerance’.

“What’s it about?” she asked, in that guarded manner a person has when wanting precise information regarding the size of a spider crawling up their back.

“In the future, the majority of people have been made sterile through atomic war. Luckily, Sam Hell, played by ex-wrestler and John Carpenter punch bag, Roddy Piper, has a functioning sperm count. He’s kidnapped by the medical authorities, made to wear an explosive metal chastity belt and sent to Frogtown.”

“Frogtown?”

“Yes, that’s where the genetically-mutated frog people live and they’ve kidnapped a group of fertile women to use as sex slaves. Don’t worry though, they won’t be forced to endure the misery of the Dance of Three Snakes because I just bet Sam’s going to break in there, free them and then get on with the impregnations.”

At that moment, I don’t think I exaggerate to note that an eight-year long relationship hung in the balance. She sighed.

“You don’t half watch some shit.”

I watched HELL COMES TO FROGTOWN on my own and enjoyed myself a great deal.

Obviously it’s silly, terribly so, but there’s nothing wrong with that.

HELL COMES TO FROGTOWN is an exploitation movie. It was made on a pittance (though they obviously spent a few quid on the frog masks as they’re actually rather good) and aims to do nothing less noble than amuse whoever shelled out a few quid to watch it. It succeeds perfectly. It has it’s fly-encrusted tongue thrust firmly into its eustachian tube, it never takes itself remotely seriously and doesn’t expect us to either.

Reviewing films like this always feels a bid redundant because, honestly, you either enjoy this sort of thing or you don’t. If you’re the kind of viewer that hates B Movie trashy fun then clearly, you won’t enjoy this. If however, like me, you love a bit of cinematic foolishness then HELL COMES TO FROGTOWN is an absolute joy.

Arrow have released it as a limited edition (1,000 copies) Blu-ray/DVD combo pack available exclusively through Amazon. It looks and sounds excellent (I do so love films like this being put on Blu-ray, it feels cheeky, like breaking into Cartier and then pinning your ill-gotten gains on a corpse). Special features: an interview with Roddy Piper talking about his acting career in general and HELL COMES TO FROGTOWN in particular; special effects man, Steve Wang talking about his froggy creations and actor, Brian Frank, talking about his role as Commander Toty, the chief villain.

About Phil Lunt (905 Articles)
<p>Hailing from the rain-sodden, North Western wastelands of England, Phil has dabbled in many an arcane vocation. From rock-star to conveyor-belt scraper at a bread factory, ‘Dairy Logistics Technician’ to world’s worst waiter.</p> <p>He’s currently a freelance designer, actor, sometime writer/editor and Chair of the British Fantasy Society. He is on the Global Frequency and is still considering becoming an astronaut when he grows up.</p>